My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Randomize
