I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Randomize
