we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Even the bartender felt bad for me
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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