please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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