it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
