She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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