Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Randomize
