Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Randomize
