Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
