tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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