Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Randomize