At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
