I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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