she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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