Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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