He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize