I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
