so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
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