Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Randomize
