And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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