Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
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