he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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