I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
