Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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