Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
I'm passing your future prison.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
