noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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