benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
