It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
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