standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize