I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
