I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
