Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
