But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Randomize
