if i can run in heels then i can drive
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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