what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
i now understand why vodka
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Randomize
