You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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