so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
