I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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