I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Two words: blizzard sex
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Randomize
