Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Swine flu. Run for my life!
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Randomize