i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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