I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
