I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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