Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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