stop calling my apartment porn island.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
