Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize