I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
