I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Randomize
