oh fat girl friday strikes again...
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Randomize