Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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