Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
apparently the secret to your success is patron
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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